Stick and stones will break your bones, but words will slowly destroy you...

"The words you speak become the house you live in."

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Thanks so much for joining us. If you want to see more of what we’ve talked about, check out previous stuff here: https://kpakpos-newsletter.beehiiv.com/

Today we’re talking about the very core of your experience in the world.

The words that come out of your mouth and the ones you speak in your head shape your life.

It’s a simple truth that is often overlooked.

Consider that many people feel as though they’re powerless victims of circumstance.

Yet, they’ve never begun to entertain the idea that the way they talk could be the main factor.

Talk to yourself like a winner and that’s how you’ll feel.

Talk to yourself like a loser and that’s how you’ll feel.

Do you understand?

Here’s an example.

When we started working together, Sarah (not her real name), a 35-year old teacher, told me that she was always known as the always busy, anxious one among her friends.

It’s obvious that it was doing her more harm than good.

However you view yourself, that's how you'll remain.

And when we examined how true this was, we found she used this story in her head to hide how much time she wasted in the day on social media and TV she didn’t even enjoy.

Yet she didn’t have time to work out for 30 minutes 3 or 4 times per week.

"Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity." – James Clear

If you see yourself as a fit, healthy person, even though your senses may tell you otherwise, eventually that’s how you end up.

Your words shape your identity.

Your identity shapes your behavior.

And your behavior shapes your reality.

Suffice to say, by using this frame, Sarah constantly kept herself in a state of stress & overwhelm despite having the opportunity to overcome them.

Her subconscious would seek out ways to reinforce her anxiety producing behaviour.

Your subconscious mind takes everything seriously.

It takes what you say literally.

Once you understand this, you become much more aware of the internal dialogue you have with yourself, and especially the words you use.

You can’t break free of your shackles if you sit there and admire them.

Summary

Self-awareness is the key to lasting change. If you don’t know there’s a problem, how can you expect to do something about it?

Self-talk is perhaps the most important facet of self-awareness.

I encourage you to become aware of your self-talk over the next few days. Notice the repeating patterns and words you use.

Do you always look for why things won’t work?

Do you reinforce an image of yourself in your head without knowing it?

Do this & see the difference:

Take a piece of paper and write down five beliefs you have about yourself, and more importantly, your current state of health.

For example:

"I never feel like exercising."

"I'm not disciplined with my diet."

"I always sleep terribly."

"I'm just used to having no energy."

Just write the first thing that comes to mind. You may be surprised, or even shocked at what you find.

These beliefs or thought patterns will serve as a looking glass into your subconscious mind.

Don’t leave this browser until you’ve done it. The universe LOVES speed and action.

And reply to tell me what you’ve realised.

I’m reading all the replies.

To your best health,

Dr Kpakpo